Advice & Tips On Love, Women, Dating & Sexuality

Question: Help: how long till you can tell if you're in love?

(Posted by: Kristi on 2010-02-08 20:54:17)

Ok so, I have dated a lot of guys, and I have broken up with or "cut loose " a lot of guys, also been dumped a few times. Finally last spring I met a guy, we went out a few times, and for the first time in my life, I felt a VERY strong feeling that he was THE ONE. I had been in love, but never like this. however, he was a little bit of a jerk. He would say things like "hurry up your story, I'm impatient ". It turned out he wasn't interested. Now I just met a new guy 2 months ago. He is nice, cute, smart, funny, successful, and everything. I like him but I don't have that "feeling " of love. Maybe because he constantly tells me I'm beautiful/ wonderful, almost overbearingly often. Is it possible that over time I will grow to love this man? I wish I loved this nice guy instead of the other mean guy. Any advice? How does one get that "love " feeling? Should I tell him to back off and stop saying nice things to me every 2 seconds? Any advice is appreciated.

Posted by: ekto s on 2010-02-08, 21:02:52

Women, generally, are NOT attracted to nice guys. They like jerks who make lots of drama and treat them badly. I guess it is the excitement of it. But realize this, if you pass the nice guy who is right for you, then you may never find another. It is clear that you like jerks, but why can't you like someone who is nice? If you like a jerk, you will try to change him to be nice. Why not just start with a nice guy and forget all that drama and emotional pain?????

Posted by: lol on 2010-02-08, 21:03:54

Hmm id say there no way to bring on the feeling and until you feel it without trying you should waste your time with guys you dont feel it with

Posted by: Precision on 2010-02-09, 00:05:37

I would tell him to limit saying nice things about you to one or two per day. It would be too overbearing for anyone to handle and deal with. Sometimes that love feeling takes a long time and sometime it take a short amount of time. It depends on the closeness you both have and how much time you spend with each other. It could be he is the type of guy that is good at saying words, yet lacks the physical ability to express them. Actions speak louder then words.